The State of the Black Family
When examining the state of the black family, there are multitudinous elements that make up the institution of the black family that must be considered. We must look at lucidly defined the roles of each member of the family, as well as developing a lucid perspicacity of the function of the family. One of the primary issues that plagues the black collective, as a whole, is the complete failure to understand the role that the family plays in the progression of the race.
The family is the core institution of social, academic and political development. It is where humans develop their value system, self-image, sense of purpose and social paradigms. When the family is spurned by enough people within a particular group, chaos and social disruption are the end result. We have seen it on a number of different levels in America, including national chaos, based on an entire culture that does not value the concept of marriage and family. However, the group that expresses this truth most emphatically is the black race.
The State of the Black Family
Since the beginning of the Trans-Atlantic Slave Trade, there has been a consistent attack on the black family. The psychological concepts set forth in the Willie Lynch Letter reveal the original machinations that were used to create dissension in the black family. While there are some who argue against the authenticity of the Willie Lynch Letter, they completely miss the point. Whether the let
ter is authentic or not is irrelevant when considering the fact that the psychological brainwashing process that is set forth in the letter was actually used against Africans as a part of the “breaking” process. We tend to major in the minor, and it always leads to losing our focus on the things that matter.
After slavery was legally abolished, at least in the form of chattel slavery, the attack on the black family did not end, the mechanisms that were used to assault the black family simply evolved to accommodate the time and the political atmosphere. One constant has been to emasculate the black man through a number of different modalities, including locking him out of the job market, even at the expense of allowing the black woman in. Actually, allowing the black woman in corporate America was an ingenious move. It was a perpetuation of distorting the roles of the black man and the black woman in the home. This distortion had begun during slavery, when the black woman was forced to negotiate herself with her white master, for provision, protection and ultimate survival. The black man was relegated to the position of the stud and field hand.
Another way that the black family, specifically the black marriage, was assaulted was the creation of the illusion that a black man’s value to his family is in his financial fluidity. What this did was create a simultaneous and inexorable force that pushed women toward perceived independence, while effectively financially castrating black men. The math was actually simple, but the temptation was so alluring that we did not even attempt to solve the problem. If there are only so many jobs in corporate America for blacks, and these jobs are opened up to black women, guess who would be locked out.
What makes this move such a pernicious influence on the black family is the fact that the black woman had begun to see the black man as a commodity — a means to an end. In other words, once she began to make her own money, she no longer saw a need for him, because she could now provide for herself leading to the erroneous concept that became the universal mantra of black women — “I don’t need a man.” What she did not consider was the massive impact his masculine energy had on the black home. She did not give consideration to the inexorable force of his love and how it impacted the progeny that he created. She became lost in the illusion of independence, which was nothing more than another way that the white man had made her dependent upon him. He was the one who owned and ran the vast majority of the corporations that black women were invading.
The black man escaped his feelings of inadequacy by abandoning his position in the home, and subsequently abdicating his role as leader, provider, protector and covering for his family and community. He launched a self-centered campaign of conquest and accomplishment. He was determined to prove his worth based on his attainment of material wealth, as well as academic and social achievement. Another negative trait of men was the emergence of hyper-masculinity in the way inward violence. In other words, it became easier and easier for black men to settle their conflicts through mortal violence.
The key is to understand that both sides (the fact that I am even referring to “sides” here speaks volumes) to understand that we have been played by a system that seeks to destroy us at all cost. We bought into the lie that our best source of strength, our mate, was our enemy. The black man has become self-absorbed and disconnected, and the black woman perpetually hostile and contemptuous toward the black man. The black man has found it to be an acceptable course of action to procreate and abandon his progeny. He has become derelict in his role as a covering, provider, protector and leader of his family and his community. The black woman has become convinced that her survival without the black man over the last 40 years is, somehow, indicative of the fact that she does not need him. We have been conditioned to gauge our progression by our things, corporate positioning and the approbation we earn from mainstream America, but our true strength is in fulfilling our natural roles and actualizing our potential for greatness as a unit.
The black family is the most primal of human institutions, it is the environment and the system through which our children are prepared to be successful in a world that is immensely hostile toward them. It is where our children become aware of their heritage, and the responsibility that is associated with it. Black men must reengage our filial responsibilities as we abandon the selfish, egocentric mindsets that have betrayed us. Black women must become intimately acquainted with her innate identity. She must understand that the black man is more than a commodity. He is a part of her. He is a black man, with or without a job. While it is his responsibility to provide, his struggles in that area do not necessarily disqualify him to function in his ultimate responsibility.
Additionally, black women must understand that it is her spiritual womb that will give birth to the vision of the man, so if he is not completely there yet, it is because he needs her. The black woman is the greatest affirmation of black male masculinity. She can no longer allow herself to be used as the greatest tool for dismantling the black man’s confidence and sense of purpose.
Finally, the black man must understand that there has been no woman who has suffered through what the black woman has suffered. No woman has experienced rape and incest at the level of the black woman. No woman has experienced abandonment at the level of the black woman. No woman has been left to raise the progeny of their men at the rate of black women. With this in mind, we must be cognizant of the fact that our women are often broken and damaged, many times at the hand of another black man. They have died spiritually and emotionally, and black men have the responsibility to love them back to life.
There is enough blame to go around, but there is no time to point the finger of blame. We must stand up and begin the process of rebuilding. This is our time, and no one can take anything away from us that we don’t give them. Make no mistake about it, the rise of the black nation is at hand! ~ Dr. Rick Wallace, Ph.D.