Restoring What has Been Destroyed: The Black Family Nucleus
It is my belief that the restoration of the black family nucleus is essential to the elevation and empowerment of the black race. I shared the following written statement on a social media thread where the discussion was focused on the importance of women understanding where their true power lies, especially in the way that they treat their men. I felt it was worth sharing here. The video, “Restoring What has Been Destroyed: The Black Family Nucleus” addresses the roles of the black man and the black women in the black family and the black community.
“Listen ladies. There is nothing, absolutely nothing, that drives a man toward greatness more than the affirmation and respect of a woman — nothing.
We prefer to have respect and affirmation over love. Your verbal affirmations and the giving of your physical womb to us are the two most powerful forms of affirmation there are. If you want to know why a man continues to go from the bed of one woman to another, it is because subconsciously, he is chasing the affirmation that he feels at the moment she gives herself to him.
Unfortunately, we have cheapened that moment and diluted its power.
I teach groups, couples and individuals this on a regular basis. Black men must come to understand that the black woman has been wounded by betrayal and abandonment. She has been devastated by the erroneous behavior of black men who have found it to be an acceptable course of action to procreate and then abandon our progeny. So, the black man must understand that a certain part of the black woman has died, and therefore, black men must be willing to love our women back to life.
Black women must understand that there has been no man on the face of the earth that has been systematically emasculated like the black man has. Slave owners used the black woman to break the black man by making him feel powerless. They used the contempt of the black woman for her man to make him feel useless and despised.
The black man is under attack in corporate America, the educational system and the community, and he is systematically targeted for placement in the Private Prison Industrial Complex. So, our women need to understand they have the power to restore life to the spirit of power in the black man. Only a black woman has the power to take the vision of a black man, place it in her spiritual womb, and birth his glory.
We all have so much work to do. Ladies, continue to share that love and continue to lift and empower your man, so that he can cover and protect you. That is how it works.”
I will continue to stand on my belief that restoring the black family nucleus is essential to the empowerment of our people. I challenge each of you to invest yourself in becoming more family centered, instead of being so egocentric. I see this on both sides: Black women and men talking about how frustrated they are that they cannot find a mate, but they are oozing with egocentricity — borderline narcissism! It is time to wake up and realize that it is not about you, it is about us! ~ Dr. Rick Wallace, Ph.D.