The Love of a Black Father
I just wanted to take a brief moment to commend our black brothers who fight hard to love and protect their progeny. With the black family nucleus having taken a major blow over the last 40 years, this is not an easy task, and it does not come without its challenges.
I don’t deny that there are some fathers who have found it to be the acceptable course of action to procreate, and then abandon their progeny; however, those numbers are far lower than mainstream media, and even some within our own ranks would have us believe.
Despite the myth, black men love hard, and there are very few things that can break a man like the pain of his children, or the inability to be a part of their life. For those fathers who have found yourselves in situations that are not highly conducive to maintaining a positive and influential relationship with your children, but you somehow find a way, I commend you.
Use Private Label Rights to Earn Money Online!
To the father who engages the enigmatic conundrum of finding a way to be present in your child’s life while being in a different city or state, I celebrate you. Your struggle does not go unnoticed.
Lastly, to the father who wants nothing more than to be a part of his child’s life, but finds himself battling a mother who is determined to use the child as leverage to settle an old score, I am standing with you.
Now, to you mothers who actually have an ex who is fighting to be a part of their child’s life, but you have determined that because he hurt you, he will not get to be a part of that child’s life — shame on you. You are the worst kind of selfish. There are things that only that father can impart upon that child, such as identity and self-worth, and you are robbing your child of that source of strength they will need in order to be all they were designed to be. The crazy thing is that many of you are aware of this because you have suffered from lack of your father’s presence in your life.
How to Get Visitors to Your Site or Blog!
There is a growing consensus among black women that black men have grown cold and aloof. Allow me to explain something to you. When you see a man that is not able to see his kid, because the mother has successfully hindered the process, the straight face that you see is actually that man’s attempt to hide the pain. He has trained himself not to show the pain or the hurt, but deep inside he is broken.
When I am counseling men who are dealing with this issue, I get the same thing almost every time. When they first walk in, they present the impression that they are straight up hard — no signs of weakness, but less than five minutes in, when the kids are mentioned, the tears begin to flow. I realize that I am one of a few people that will ever even see this, because the harsh world in which he lives requires that he man up as soon as he walks out of that door.
How dare you think that you have ownership over that child. That child does not belong to you, it belongs to its own destiny, and the father plays a major role in them taking the most advantageous path to their destiny. I don’t care what you and that person went through, if that man wants to be there, you have no right to stop him.
Lastly, to the low-life scum, like Steve Harvey, who continue to bad mouth, degrade and perpetuate the image of black men for the sake of elevating yourself and improving your standing among your white audience, shame on you. I have no respect for you whatsoever. You have been given a powerful platform from which to elevate your people, but you have chosen to elevate yourself.
Our men need to be built up and held up, because it is on the backs of our kings that we will rise up to the pinnacle of power and liberation. Black men, I challenge you to be worthy of the title “King!” Black women, I challenge you to invest your energy is lifting him instead of breaking him. You have been used long enough for that.
We have so much work ahead of us, but the mission will be so much more laborious when there is no harmony between our women and men. Our children need and deserve parents who are willing to make the selfless sacrifice of leaving the past in the past. ~ Dr. Rick Wallace, Ph.D.